The Hudson Valley, particularly Westchester and Putnam Counties, is one of the most expensive parts of our country to live in. Living in the Hudson Valley you are constantly keeping up with the Joneses. Two- income families are often necessary to meet household expenses here and, if you are not part of the 1%, living paycheck to paycheck is quite common.
Factor in a divorce and the reality of living separately in two households with the same income level is profound. The combination of cutting down expenses and making more money is easier said than done and often may not be able to happen immediately. In the Hudson Valley, the cost of living baseline is so high that cutting expenses and making more still may not be enough for either or both spouses to remain in the area.
After divorce, keeping up the marital lifestyle may no longer be possible and the reality of that is sobering for each family member. In an era where social media documents our every acquisition and whereabouts, this change can be especially difficult to process. The loss of a life once had along with the loss of hopes and dreams can have lasting effects on members of the family. The reality of divorce is hard to comprehend and how you choose to divorce can significantly impact how your family lands on the other side.
Choosing to divorce in the Collaborative Divorce and Divorce Mediation models provides the support necessary for each party to work together and achieve the best possible outcome.
Choosing how you divorce, however, is one powerful way of minimizing the cost of divorce. While the financial cost may be measurable, the emotional and psychological cost is immeasurable especially in an adversarial divorce with each party working against the other. Choosing to divorce in the Collaborative Divorce and Divorce Mediation models provides the support necessary for each party to work together and achieve the best possible outcome. Selecting professionals trained in these models maximizes the chances of reaching a resolution that balances the needs and interests of each family member. Creative problem solving in the face of a new post -divorce reality can be made with the assistance of professionals trained in conflict resolution. Parties working together with a team dedicated to providing the support and resources necessary can make informed and reasoned decisions about their post-divorce lives.
Communication and Understanding Inherent in the Collaborative and Mediated Divorce Models can Reduce Both Emotional ‘and’ Financial Costs
The importance of maintaining control of their post-divorce narrative cannot be understated. This in and of itself will make a Hudson Valley divorce less costly. Less time will be spent weaponizing emotions, fighting positions in court and strategizing how to get the most and give the least. More time will be spent communicating and understanding the interests and concerns beneath positions and reaching agreement that will allow each person to achieve what is truly most important.
A divorce settlement predicated upon the most important needs and interests of each family member will likely result in a better outcome for all. Approaching divorce as a challenge to resolve together can transform a difficult financial and emotional reality into a more promising future with greater possibilities and outcomes for the entire family.
The landscape of divorce is better managed in a cooperative, supportive environment where the best possible decisions can be made with clarity and purpose and not derailed by irrational and destructive emotions. In fact, the judicial system in New York has taken steps to develop early presumptive and mandatory alternative dispute resolution programs in civil New York cases with some exceptions. This new court initiative validates alternate dispute resolution’s role in helping parties reach a resolution through the understanding and the exploration of options apart from conventional litigation to resolve conflict. Litigation is so much more costly for courts and litigants alike, only adding to the challenge of divorce.
The inherent magic is in simply understanding each other and working together, not against each other. These are the best tools for reaching a more positive outcome in an already challenging Hudson Valley divorce.